Late last week, both CNN and NBC fired the men who had turned their networks into unabashed campaign wings of the Democrats party. The White House refused to confirm that the moves were sparked by President Obama’s frustration with his plummeting approval numbers and the networks’ inability to recapture the magic of the 2008 campaign.
“Let me be clear: the only person I know who can tolerate watching more than 30 seconds of CNN or NBC without being heavily medicated is Joe Biden. I’m not being critical of the ‘witless community,’ but Joe has all the intellectual firepower of one of those pepperoni pizzas Michelle eats after a long day of campaigning against obesity,” President Obama said.
The home of such colorful “personalities” as Keith Olberman, Rick Sanchez, Chris Matthews and Chuck Todd, audiences for the two sagging news ops had seriously slid during the last three years. Other than the parents and families of the on-air “talent,” CNN and NBC news are only regularly viewed in the game room of the Pleasant Springs Nursing Home in Balta, N.D., where the ancient black-and-white TV receives just the two channels.The Siesta Keyster remembers the last time he voluntarily watched a CNN newscast. While the Keyster clan was at church in December 2003, U.S. forces captured Iraqi mass-murderer Saddam Hussein. We tuned in CNN as soon as we got home. After 15 minutes of listening to CNN reporters explain how this was actually horrible news for the U.S., we switched to Fox and have resided there ever since.

CNN's Jon Klein: 'Elliott is a perfect for CNN, not only is he completely without morality, he's dull and egomanical as well!'
Zucker’s main achievement, other than halving the size of NBC’s news audience, was infecting all NBC operations, from the openly Marxist MSNBC to NBC Sports, with far-leftist ideology. Typical of Zucker’s genius was pushing paranoid madman Keith Olberman as a commentator on NFL pre-game broadcasts and using comedy shows to portray Christians and conservatives as racist Cro-Magnons.
Klein’s major contribution to the world of journalism, besides donating some 28,000 hours of fawning coverage to the Obama presidential campaign, was hiring noted sex offender Elliott Spitzer as a news commentator. Yes, beginning this Monday, you can thrill to the political insights of the disgraced New York governor, aka “Client Number 9” of the Emperors Club prostitution ring.
The nation is thankful Klein got sacked before he could complete the deal to hire Jeffrey Dahmer to provide analysis for the upcoming mid-term elections. While it’s easy to avoid CNN at home, the problem is that Ted Turner, who founded CNN in 1980, struck deals to have airports nationwide exclusively broadcast CNN on monitors throughout the concourses.
So there you are, trying to get from concourse A to C at the Atlanta airport. As you’re weaving in and out of the crowds, you’re assaulted by CNN: “A big development today in Washington: Republican leaders, under orders from fat-cat Wall Street billionaires, tried to stop President Obama, a great guy who has a dog named Bo, from investing $649 billion to provide free cookies and milk for union members. In other news, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi introduced a wonderful new bill to construct monorail systems at the southern U.S. border. The $159 billion program will provide swift, air-conditioned transportation for illegal immigrants and terrorists now forced to trek over miles of desert…”